Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Safe, Legal, and Common

"Let's make abortion safe, legal, and rare!"

..how many times have you heard that?


This is a problematic saying. It portrays abortion as a problem, as a bad thing that must be rare. It diverts the attention from the unwanted pregnancy, which is a problem, to abortion, which should serve as a solution to a problem. Is chemotherapy bad? No, but cancer is. Is Advil bad? No, but headaches are. Is abortion bad? Not unless the abortion is unwanted/forced/coerced (in which case it'd be awful, just like forced pregnancy). It's the unwanted pregnancy that is the problem.


We will have as many abortions as we need at any given time. Right now we have about 1.2 million abortions a year in the US, and hey, what do you know? That's how many we need.. That's the 'right' number for right now. When we construct a society that supports pregnant women/girls and teaches kids real sex ed, the number of abortions we'll need will probably go down. Or maybe, one day, the number of abortions we'll need will go up for whatever reason. The important thing to remember is that the high number of abortions we have is not a tragedy, it's simply necessary. You could describe unwanted pregnancies as a tragedy. You could describe lack of sex education a tragedy. However, abortion itself is not the bad thing. Abortion is a blessing.


Again, when I say that, I'm certainly not talking about forced/coerced/unwanted abortions. Just like forced pregnancies, forced abortions are tragedies. However, that does not make abortion as a whole a tragedy. Rape happens, but no one ever describes sex as a tragedy. Forced pregnancy happens, but no one ever describes pregnancy itself as a tragedy. The coercion/force makes a huge difference. It's the same difference between sex and rape and between borrowing and stealing.


I'll go ahead and say it; I freaking love abortion. Abortion is amazing. It's beautiful. I thank God that I have this right, even though I never suspect that I'll have to use it (but hey.. who suspects an unwanted pregnancy anyway). Choice is empowering. An unexpected pregnancy does not scare me so much because I know I have the power to choose. I think, if I got pregnant, I'd choose to parent, and I thank God that abortion is legal because otherwise I would not have that choice. Parenting would simply be forced upon me. Even as a woman who would probably go through an unexpected pregnancy, I LOVE ABORTION. Yes, abortion is common. No, that is not some kind of tragedy. Unless you'd describe or portray the rate of chemotherapy as a tragedy, please don't describe abortion as one. Let's focus on the actual problems, and the problem is not abortion.

14 comments:

  1. Well, there is also the option of adoption that one could choose....just saying :-)

    As for this post, yeah I think the real shame with today is this: we have SO MANY choices for birth control, and it's a shame that women end up with unplanned pregnancy because of lack of education regarding sex ed and lack of resources to birth control. Let's face it...Birth Control can be...no scratch that, IS EXPENSIVE!!

    I think it would be great if both adoption and abortion numbers went down! I think adoption is awesome but I'd certainly love to see the numbers go down. I don't think ANY woman really wants to deal with the emotions surrounding an unplanned pregnancy, the emotional toll of trying to decide what to do, and then possibly making peace with that decision. It can be very stressful to be in that situation!

    I mean really...isn't it sad that in 2010 there are SO MANY unplanned pregnancies? 1.2 million abortions, thousands of adoptions, and who knows how many of women who end up raising their babies. Even if we were to use a round about "safe" estimation of 2 million...2 MILLION UNPLANNED PREGNANCIES?!?!?! Seriously, THAT is the REAL issue.

    So, personally, my take on saying, "Let's make abortion safe, legal, and rare!" is because in 2010 both adoption and abortion should be rare- because unplanned pregnancies should be rare! Women (and men) should have access to birth control AND better sex education!! We should be focusing on preventive care- making BC affordable and accessible!

    Allison

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  2. Allison-

    The adoption system needs to be heavily reformed before it's any good. Right now, mothers (and by mothers I mean 'birthmothers') are pretty much treated like non-humans. Also, there's the point that an open adoption can be closed any time by the adoptive parents- it's not legally enforceable. Adoption tends to require the mother to go through *a lot* of pain and even exploitation, from what I've learned about it. It's fine if someone really wants to do it and there is no exploitation involved, but I really do not trust the adoption industry as it is now.

    The problem with "safe, legal, and rare" is that it puts the focus on the abortion. It's a subtle difference, but imo, it's really important to emphasize that no, abortions are not a problem and yes, unplanned pregnancies are. So, the saying should be IMO "safe, legal, and as rare or as common as it needs to be" and for unplanned pregnancy something like "prevented, rare, and cared for" (by cared for I mean we should actually help women w/ unwanted pregnancies instead of saying "WELL YOU SHOULDA KEPT YOUR LEGS CLOSED!!")

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  3. We seem to be on the same page and all, actually. It's just that subtle difference in wording, which I think it very important.

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  4. I totally agree that adoption needs a reform!

    A. I think the costs that go into it are a joke. Just the fact that an African American Boy will go for about $16K and a Caucasian girl goes for $35K shows that it isn't really about the child...but about what's in demand. And that's sad.

    B. I also agree that it isn't right that open adoptions can close at anytime. My best friend put her son up for adoption and this family did that to her. They promised letters twice a year and over the years the letters are fewer and fewer.

    C. Many families that adopt only will adopt from states that aren't birthmom friendly. This to me is stupid. If a woman changes her mind and wants her baby back...then one needs to put their desires for a baby aside and give her HER baby back.

    I'm sure you know that my hubby and I are adopting. But I've already put stipulations in place to ensure that the child we adopt is really a child who needs a home and not anything else. I will adopt from any state. I will ensure that the birthmother is really sure about her decision and that it was something she was pressured into. I will honor our commitment to her. I'm VERY open to adoption with visitation rights (assuming the mother isn't a drug addict or mentally unstable...at that point it would be more of a discerning visit) because even though I'm raising the child...it is still HER child too. Having two sets of "parents" is okay!!

    Yeah, I think we are saying the same thing too.

    Allison

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  5. Your argument is fallacious.

    Abortion, except in extremely rare cases, is an elective procedure. Elective is the antithesis of 'needed'. There is no clinical need for an elective procedure, including abortion. Even taking into account the 'mental health' argument, the medical community will not recognize abortion (except in very rare cases) as a 'needed' procedure, hence the term 'elective' (as opposed to medical).

    Malignant cancer, left untreated, causes death. Pregnancy (except in extremely rare cases), does not. It does not matter that an elective abortion is a statistically safe procedure. Cancer left untreated will cause death, pregnancy does not, so you are comparing apples to oranges.

    Abortion is a problem to those, who using good science and logical reasoning, know exactly what it does. Shifting the problem from electively aborting human beings to the actual human being being aborted is a classical manifestation of transferrence.

    Granting yourself the right to end a life merely because it inconveniences you is tantamount to murder, regardless of how many old white men wrongly gave you that right, or how many racist white women say it empowers you.

    However, you certainly do have that right. Keep on lovin' abortion. Answer this for me -Why don't you get pregnant so you can have one just to see what it's like (you know, since you love it so much)?? I know many ways you can subsidize it, so don't say money is a factor. If it is all the things you say it is,and you LOVE it, I think you should try it, and if you don't want to, tell me ----- why? Sincerely, I'm curious to hear you answer, so don't chicken out on this one, please.

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  6. First of all, stop promoting the myth that pregnancy is a mere inconvenience. Ask *anyone* who has gone through a pregnancy (who isn't some anti who is going to lie just to 'prove me wrong') and they will say that pregnancy is LIFE CHANGING. Nothing that is life changing can also be described as a mere inconvenience. Thanks for showing off your misogynistic tendencies here.

    Second of all, money *is* an issue. Just because you can apparently afford to cough up 400 dollars at any given time without it even putting a dent in your wallet doesn't mean that everyone else can, so recognize your privilege and stop shoving it in other people's faces. I could go to an abortion fund, yes, but in doing so I would be taking money that would have been used for other women seeking abortions.

    Seriously, who wants to have surgery just to have surgery? Yes, abortion is a great thing. That doesn't mean that women go to abortion clinics like they go to Disney world. Surgery isn't fun. That doesn't mean that it isn't good.

    I've always thought that, if I had an abortion, I would be able to relate more closely with my future patients. It would simply be illogical to get pregnant for that alone, though. I can (and do) love abortion even though I haven't had one and am not going to get pregnant just to have one.

    And by the way, if your comments get any more rude, mean spirited, or ridiculous you aren't going to get through the filter again. I was being very lenient by letting that one in.

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  7. Allison-

    It's good to see that there are adoptive parents out there who do care about the birthmother. I hope everything goes well for you, the mother, and your family!

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  8. I didn't say that pregnancy was a "mere inconvenience", I said that ending one because it was inconvenient was tantamount to murder.

    You need only go to other abortion lovers' sites to hear all of the stories about how abortion is no big deal, not inconvenient, not painful. A pharmacologically induced abortion is not expensive, and does not entail a surgical procedure, so why don't you do that? I'll give you the money. If you don't want to, please tell me why (since you love abortion).

    You have not sincerely addressed my comment at all. Why do you compare pregnancy and cancer when there is no comparison?

    What part of my comment was rude, mean spirited, or ridiculous? Sincerely, I'm curious.Also, what part is wrong?

    And yes, you have the power to moderate my response into oblivion. But please answer why you don't want to get pregnant, and use the abortion pill if you love abortion? Why don't you want to have one?

    X

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  9. PS. if an ill timed pregnancy was not inconvenient, why would you want an abortion?
    Don't put words in my mouth that aren't there, I'd venture to say I understand the impact of pregnancy a little better than you do.

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  10. "I didn't say that pregnancy was a "mere inconvenience", I said that ending one because it was inconvenient"

    ...'I didn't say that pregnancy was an inconvenience, I'm just saying that ending one BECAUSE IT'S INCONVENIENT....' So yes, you are calling pregnancy a mere inconvenience.

    "A pharmacologically induced abortion is not expensive"

    Again, shoving your privilege in other people's faces. Just because coughing up hundreds of dollars isn't a big deal to you doesn't mean it isn't to other people. First of all, if I were to have an abortion at all it WOULD be surgical. The abortion pill would not be for me. My reasons still stands. Even being emotionally content with my decision, it would be illogical to go through the physical aspects of an abortion just to go through it. What kind of anti-abortion person pays for an abortion? If you really want to pay for one, just donate about $400 dollars to an abortion fund. Thanks.

    "if an ill timed pregnancy was not inconvenient, why would you want an abortion?"

    Because it's life changing, and that may not be a change that I want.

    Oh and rude- shoving your privilege in other people's faces

    Mean spirited- calling life changing experiences inconveniences

    Ridiculous- telling me that I should go get surgery just because.

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  11. I'd go one step further and say that there likely are fewer abortions than are actually necessary, considering that many women who would otherwise choose an abortion instead carry a pregnancy to term simply because they lack the resources to pay. Medicaid doesn't cover abortion because the Hyde Amendment bans abortion, and it can be impossible to come up with several hundred to several thousand dollars on short notice.

    In addition, many women live so far from an abortion provider that it just becomes an impossibility.

    So I guess I'd add just one word to the mantra, and that would be: ACCESSIBLE.

    Thanks, ProChoiceGal--great post! And thank goodness for the National Network of Abortion Funds for helping to ensure that all women can get a safe abortion.

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  12. Yeah, Stacey. Accessible is definitely a huge part of that. Legal doesn't mean much if abortion is inaccessible, particularly to those women who are poor or underprivileged.

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  13. Reduce the number of unwanted pregnancies, you reduce the number of abortions. Funny how no anti-abortion groups work for access to contraception and sex education. Who does? Oh that's right, pro-choice groups. It's almost like the anti-choice are more about controlling lives then they are about saving them. Oh wait, it's exactly like that.

    Thanks ProChoiceGal keep up the great work! Oh and to that anti (anon) poster, sure send the money on over to me! I have a paypal account already set up. Give me your email and I'll send you an invoice. I would have zero problems taking your money.

    But seriously, we hear that abortion is murder every day. If you're really looking to convince and not just to attack you're going to have to do a little better than that. A fetus isn't a separate autonomous individual, it's effectively parasitic. That is, it feeds off of your body and you gain no benefits in return. I have a job, a life, bills to pay, you know, little things. I can't sacrifice my body to another organism for nine months (and then 18 years.) Literally. I can't. Having a baby just because I got pregnant with no regard to my ability to care of that life would be just as illogical as getting pregnant just to have an abortion. It's not elective, it's necessary for my quality of life.
    Emotional, physical, financial, the list goes on. You know you can choose not to have chemo. You'll just die a little sooner than you would if you had it. But if you'd rather have that shorter life free of the burden of chemo than have a longer life with it, then not having chemo is what's necessary for you to live, really live, the way you want to live.

    We all die. What matters is the quality of life we live. I care about life, which is why I won't bring a child into this world until I can give it quality of life. Life IS such a precious, important thing. If anything abortion should be the default, until we are sure that we are capable of nurturing a new human life, to make that life our priority before our own. That certainly is the case for me. Sure, there are women that regret their abortions, but what about the women who regret their children? To me, the latter is what should be avoided at all costs. As Martin Luther King said, "There is scarcely anything more tragic in human life than a child who is not wanted. That which should be a blessing becomes a curse for parent and child." That right there is the reason I loooooove abortion. I have a big fat lesbian amazonian femanazi crush on it, because prevents the unwanted. Simple as that.

    -jenkcarl

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  14. I always took that particular expression to mean we need to emphasize education and prevention of unintended pregnancies (i.e., birth control). Sadly the RRRW wants to keep both away from the public in the interest of making women eternal brood sows for Jesus.

    IMO birth control should be very cheap, if not free. Children should be given comprehensive, factual sex-ed and access to birth control. Abortion should be safe, legal, affordable and accessible. Ignoring the fact that we're sexual beings has never, and will never, stop people from engaging in sex. Threats and shaming has never and will never do anything good either.

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***PLEASE READ***

Due to constant spam and derailing coming from a few antis, I am now making this blog a "safe place". This does not mean that I won't allow opposing views. It means that I'm not longer going to allow hateful or unrelated/spammy comments. This will continue on until the anti-choice spammers get bored with harassing me and the people who post here, and is especially relevant when it comes to the topic of rape. I hope this doesn't deter any respectful people from commenting. :)